You let this happen
02.44 AM its always in the same time, i woke up feeling my body shaking and i found myself hard to breathe. Remembering all promises, lies, and how can this happen to us.
Everything was just fine back then, we try to pursue our goal. I was in another city, and he just start his new journey with opening new business and managing a cafe. We were caught up in our busy schedule, but overall we just fine. We always find our way to back home.
Until.. on November to December he has changed. He was suddenly had this new group of friends, I felt like he try to hide something from me. I dont have detective mode, never i doubt his loyalty and trust him with all my heart that he wouldn’t do things that can made him losing me.
But i found his lying..
I was so in pain, when i knew that he choose to losing me. I was remember how he act to hurt me, knowing it would make me feel guilty, every problems comes from things that came from me, like he try to blame his decisions was made from who i was.
On February, the right after he said he wont this relationship, the next day he come to his friend’s wedding with her, the girl i was said to avoid. The girl he choose to lying and defend her over me, and said “aku cuman mau berbuat baik” as a reason.
I blocked him. I hate him for made me feel like shits. But even i know im in pain, im still waiting him to showing up, and missing him.
then come to the day he said he would merry her.
my world just shattered
all things you did to hurt me, it all make sense cause from the beginning you change your purpose, im just your second option.
All the time i spend, all the things i gave, the love, the pure one, he just throw it away for a girl he just knew so little.
When you said you were focusing yourself on building your empire so we can be together, where it is now? you just make me confuse, you make me feel bad about myself. After all this time, how could you have that gut to hurt me?
Did you know…
What you did to me will impact to my life?
I felt all we had was a lie, you never want me, all you want its all i had for you, that benefit you, things i dont have anymore. How can i survive from this? Have you ever imagine the pain i need to go through? No you wouldn’t, cause you let this happen.
